By BRIAN BERKMAN

"The green button is for the butler." With those few words my inflated ego felt totally at home in India – cradled amid the poverty and chaos – in the lap of luxury at an Oberoi Hotel Group property. I mention the poverty upfront because that is the most FAQ I get from people who haven’t visited India and want to know if I was shocked. In a word: No. I saw some things that upset me deeply – bears being forced to perform tricks under pain of a hard stick, rubbish allowed to pile up along the sides of streets and animals foraging through it – but the poverty didn’t shock me. Maybe I’m immune to it, having seen so much of it here, or maybe I’m an insensitive so-and-so.

I was aware that directly outside these opulent hotels, families lived very simply, in difficult circumstances. Either that thought was relegated deep into my unconscious or I truly believe that the Indians can be happy wherever life places them. I didn’t once feel guilty about enjoying the luxury I’d landed in.

Camel fair

Rajasthan, India’s princely state, is a firm favourite on tourist itineraries and is included in India’s Golden Triangle. The capital, Jaipur – the Pink City (terracotta actually) – sits on one side of the Aravalli mountain range while Jodhpur, the Blue city, is on the other. In Rajasthan we visited Jaipur and Udaipur although I would have liked to have visited Pushkar too, which is famous for its camel fair.

The Oberoi Rajvilas in Jaipur is perhaps not the best setting from which to explore, as the hotel and its I’d-adopt-you-if-I-could staff provide too many reasons to stay in the hotel rather than venture out. Such as the butler – a rotating position dedicated to taking care of everything imaginable. I had the good fortune to stay at the Ritz Carlton Hotel in Kuala Lumpur a few years ago. It offered Butler-drawn baths and I had thought that as a six-star Diamond resort, I had experienced the ultimate luxury. I think the Oberoi Rajvilas sets a new standard for luxury - luxury in the detail and in the attention.

Feeling my way around the parameters of what could (or should) be asked for, I first requested that our luggage be unpacked. That was obviously a commonplace request as after a short consultation about whether I preferred underpants and socks to be in the same drawer, it was done. Trying my luck, I asked – tentatively as if walking on eggs – if he could arrange that a large collection of stainless-steel tiffins that I had bought in the old Delhi market and lugged across India, could be repacked in something more suitable to check into SAA Business Class?

It was as if a beast had been unleashed in me. I had tasted luxury and its attendant attention and I wanted more. Would I dare to ask to have my bath drawn, or to have that morning’s issue of The Times of India read to me in bed while sipping rose-scented melon juice or could I confine this new luxury to the more appropriate?

I stopped short, only in deference to my mortified Uncle Edward, who has that unpleasant English notion of probity when it comes to dealing with one’s servants. I knew that my glee in this case would be to his chagrin so I limited myself to asking the butler to wrap gifts for people at home, confirm travel arrangements, sort laundry and make dinner reservations.

Sunken marble bath

The bathroom at the Rajvilas was by far the most suited to my turgescent belly. The sunken marble bath, clearly intended for a Maharajah and his concubines, took an eon to fill and felt more like a warm swimming pool. Looking out through the picture window at the enclosed landscaping centred on a water feature, with candles atop carved silver holders, I knew that for the next few days I could revel in luxury, be pandered to, eschew reality and in all respects act like a ponce for a smidgen of the price it would cost to do so at home.

Of course, real Maharajas do still live in Indian palaces that nowadays are mostly hotels. As a rule, vapid English types (like my uncle) prefer the understated elegance of the genuine thing rather than a Bollywood pastiche.

We visited the vaunted Lake Palace Hotel. Centred on Lake Pichola looking back at the Shiv Niwas Palace Hotel complex, where the Maharaja of Udaipur still lives, it is a beautiful sight. The drum-playing and rose-petal throwing as we stepped from our launch on to the white marble steps was very impressive but the public areas to which we had access, while very tasteful, had a disinterested, even restrained air. The Lake Palace hotel isn’t usually open to non-residents but, because we were Oberoi guests and brought in the Oberoi cherry-wood canopied boat, we were permitted.

Awash with glamour

En route back to the shore, the skipper enquired which property we preferred. I effusively said the Udaivilas which, from his proud smile, was the answer he wanted. It seems as if there is a battle between these grand hotel groups of one-upmanship – the Oberoi creating newly built period-style properties awash with glamour whereas the Taj group seems to be focus on converting real palaces into hotels.

Visual treats include open-air colonnades flanked by 450 hand-carved stone columns. Domes covered in gold leaf. Hand-painted murals, arches and fountains. Landscaped terraces and acres of white marble. A decorative pool of giant marble lotus flowers. And, a treat for all the senses, a superb banyan Tree Spa.

Grand, majestic, in a setting of unrivalled splendour, there is absolutely nothing like it. And In terms of comfort and service, Udaivilas is in a class of its own.

Getting there:

The Small Luxury Hotels of the World brand is a collection of over 300 independently-owned exclusive hotels in more than 50 countries.

Carefully selected for their style and sophistication, Small Luxury Hotels feature award-winning properties including spas, country houses, golf resorts, island retreats, city sanctuaries, and game and wilderness lodges.

Reservations can be made at any Small Luxury Hotel by calling toll-free on 00 800 525 48000, or through the Internet at www.slh.com. Travel agents can use the GDS code LX for LuXury.

For further information or to receive an SLH directory contact Cowley Nel & Associates: Tel +21(21) 702 3436, e-mail: luxurybrands@iafrica.com

The Oberoi – Rajvilas, Jaipur.

www.oberoihotels.com Email: reservations@rajvilas.com Rates are around 395 US Dollars per deluxe room (not per person like in South Africa). If you’re in the habit of staying at five-star hotels locally, you’ll find India good value with a level of luxury and service that has unsurpassed any hospitality experience I’ve had anywhere else in the world before.

The Oberoi – Udaivilas, Udaipur. www.oberoihotels.com .

South African Airways fly to Mumbai (Bombay) four times a week. Economy fare from Cape Town is around R5750 plus taxes of R492 while Business class is around R18 920 plus taxes R492. More info from www.flysaa.com

One rand buys around six Indian rupees. It is a surprisingly affordable destination. A lavish hotel dinner would cost around R100 per person, tour guides around R65 a day and shopping will yield bargains galore.